“I’m not Christian”
“you mean you don’t believe in God?
…then, what are you?”
“I have a lot to say about that.”
but at this time I’ll be anything.
all religions are the same.
all rituals are the same.
all languages are the same.
all traditions are the same.
Look closely.
feel deeply.
forget the form,
immerse yourself in the essence.
it’s all the same.
I pray for my god
and your God will hear me.
Pray to your Mighty One
and we all listen.
Speak with the creator
and we all become into the same.
Am I Christian?
is Matthew a Saint? Is Peter?
who is Mary?
what about the baby?
is Allah a vowel?
two syllables?
is He a sound?
is it “uuuuu…”
or is it “aoum”?
Am I a Jew?
Do Gypsies have a religion?
do they just steal and create music,
the envy of all traditions?
Had I stepped on the Taurus Mountains
many times before?
did I dance on fire in Rajasthan?
was my best friend a Mongolian wild horse
that tamed me?
Is Allah my brother?
What about the calendars?
the Gregorian
Aztec or Mexica?
the time frames?
the mind games?
Did I first speak Sanskrit
or Roman letters gathered my tongue
into Latin memory
as marble sprung from
my hands into sculptures
I fathom?
Was it Turkic
or Rumanich
did I fiddle
or waltz my way
down the Bering Strait?
Did I laugh with Buddha
as we spoke Chinese?
or did I remove the nails
from The Cross?
I remember dancing for all the deities
before they were conceived.
There were many of us.
we made their altars
out of mud
and brick
we gathered stones
huge stones
light ones
that then became heavy with time.
people wonder
how we got them there
they were ten fold our size.
We burned herbs
as gifts for the wind
sweet smells
for the atoms to breathe
dense smoke
where the cells could bounce
like dance
a joy
for us to know.
The deities flew in
from the four corners
all birds migrating and none
all animals four legged with
and without tails
And now
as missiles fly
bullets trespass
as blood pools
cover dry lands,
since religion
is invented
there’s a reason
for the demented
to bully…
…all other
are mere ‘peace loving fools’.
Yes, I am Christian
I am Muslim
and Jewish
my blood is pure gypsy
I’m part Indian you know
from this land
and East land
I’m Hindu
‘aho’
Apparently sikh
and pagan,
jain and orthodox
when I wander I’m a savage
like a leaf
a flushing river
a branch in the forest for ever
I’m anything that worships life
and the living
I’m all for all organisms
existing
the wind in the wood flute
the beat in the drum
a ripple in the water
Your god if you need me
I’ll listen
and through me, all gods will listen
and through you, all gods are breathing
and through us, life is registering
in its stones
on its land
in the wind
inside its waters
in every molecule
life is registering
the unwavering love
we all feel for our gods
life is listening
it’s all the same
any language
any color
is mere form
only living in the name of life
is true believing
Life is listening
that’s what I believe in.
As per a question from Clara Khudaversian November 29th, 2003, Montreal, Canada.
[First published in untitled, poems by shanti kumari johnson, Gyldan Edge Publishing LLC, 2005.]
